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If you know me (and you probably do), you know how much I enjoy the recent renaissance of Saturday Night Live. The Lonely Island’s “Digital Shorts” are a big reason for that; they are almost always hilariously profane, and are consistently among the best bits of each episode. And although I experienced last night’s short in less-than-ideal circumstances, its jaw-dropping ridiculousness and vulgarity once again makes it one of the highlights of my week.

Normally, when linking a Digital Short, I’d quote some lyrics — or give some backstory — to explain exactly what amuses me about the joke. But this video, the sequel to an inarguable classic, chronicles the world’s two most thoughtful gift-givers…this time, as they plan for Mother’s Day.

Is any further explanation really necessary?

It’s a time-honored tradition of mine to shirk my blogging during periods of intense activity, most generally when I am feeling quite happy and content. I don’t see the blog as a conveyance for people’s anguish, but I think most people tend to post when they are feeling introspective, and happy people are simply less introspective, as a rule.

Also, the advent of Twitter hasn’t exactly stoked my desire to write full-length blogs.

So what news have I, from the last three months or so?

In a word, Aleena. Although she met an unusually large number of my friends (in other words, you), I spoke about her very, very little. I highly doubt very many people — even those who met her — have actually heard even half of the whole story. So here it is, folks, the narrative of Aleena and Eric.

Now, some of you might know that Aleena was my first date after Emma and I split for good following the holidays. Right from the start, “our thing” was kind of odd. A good bit of our first date, for example, was spent listening to her detail the many reasons I would be wise to avoid dating her: “I’m fickle. I lie. I cheat.” As it would turn out, I only ever had experience with the first. At any rate, the date was…odd. We spent about three hours at the bar, then went back to her place for perfectly platonic Guitar Hero-ing. The next morning, she invited me over and made me some amazing Eggs Benedict.

Aleena and I met online, which is not what I would consider standard for me, despite my having met a couple exes in a similar manner. Yet even online, our interaction was different than what I’m used to. When I casually asked her to entertain me with a story, anticipating perhaps some embarrassing tale from her childhood, she responded instead with what became the first installment of a dual-narrated story of a librarian and a detective/thug (found HERE, HERE, and HERE). That unanticipated but impressive bit of cleverness and creativity went a long way in shoring up my interest, even long after the storytelling stopped. It also served as a sort of Cliff’s Notes for things near to her heart: small towns, cabins in the woods, jobs involving learning and helping other people find what they’re looking for. Oh, and the occasional drink.

Things with Aleena were…well, they were in a constant state of flux, much like the woman herself. After a week or so of hanging out following our first date, we decided we weren’t really interested in each other romantically. We still hung out, though, and it wasn’t long before we fell back into an intentionally vague, semi-romantic friendship. This pattern of splitting and reuniting would continue right up until our last, final split. Neither one of us was used to having someone so close and so available, I think, and our shared interests combined with our modest demands and complementary natures to generate a sort of romantic gravity, which — time and time again — pulled us back into each other’s arms, and which, sadly, also precludes any sort of non-romantic relationship between us.

She represented a huge departure for me, in many ways. First, I introduced her to many of my friends (some of whom we spent quite a lot of time with), despite my standard habit of compartmentalizing my social and romantic lives as much as possible. This was AMAZING! They loved her and she loved them, and it was extremely fulfilling to me to see her engage them so handily and happily. Next, she wasn’t my “type”, just as I wasn’t hers. This proved another wonderful experience, though, as when I really grew to appreciate and respect her deeply, she became as much my “type” in my eyes as anyone I’ve ever met.

I never expected to fall in love again so soon after Emma. I certainly never expected it with Aleena, who totally backed into it, through many isolated episodes of endearment and affection. When I really realized the depth of my feelings for her, in early April, I was taken by surprise. But it was a pleasant surprise, and despite the recent turn and the eventual outcome, I do not regret it.

We shared a lot of great experiences, stories, fantasies, and dreams. We had a mutual love of Jeopardy!, SNL (I’M ON A BOAT!), “hangover brunches”, Northern Exposure, and booze of all varieties. We made crazy plans…some involving “treeboathouses”, roadtrips to Roslyn, and — in one touching email — leaving Seattle to teach at a rural school somewhere together. But really, we just took it really, really easy, most times, and enjoyed each other without expectation or complication.

I did my part to torpedo the relationship, just as she did. Most especially, my reaction to her recent “down time”…when her depression began to wear me down, I compensated with a thickheaded need to overtalk every single issue I perceived in our relationship. And I of course compounded that by beginning to see issues in pretty much everything. Ooops.

At any rate, taken all-in-all, Aleena was a funny, amusing, engaging person, a wonderful companion with whom I enjoyed a great deal in common, and someone who is most likely far more intelligent and creative than either she or those around her might realize. Our ridiculously complementary natures made pretty much any shared activity both highly amusing and fantastically relaxing. I never really felt I had to watch myself with her, and she felt likewise; we were able to “be ourselves” around each other very quickly, which I think is new for both of us. She is a people-pleaser to the bone, and it seems to me that nothing makes her happier than to make a friend, partner, or loved one smile, laugh, or feel loved and appreciated. To complete the canvas, however, she is also a fickle, indecisive, erratic person, and someone who is capable of being both dishonest and extremely shallow (although I honestly believe she both recognizes and hates those aspects of herself). A person of extremely generous spirit, she also struggles constantly with her habit of putting others’ needs before her own, and sometimes overcompensates with resentful jags of nitpicking or selfishness. The two biggest issues I had with her were fairly major, sadly. First, her fear of making people unhappy or putting them out makes it extremely hard for her to ask for or accept support when she needs it; during a recent period of work, school, and family stress, she became intensely low, but hid it as much as possible from even the closest of her friends. In other words, she pushes everyone away, but invariably feels lonely and unloved because of her self-imposed isolation. Second, in a sort of correlate of the first, she struggles with openness about things that are angering or upsetting her, which causes her to avoid problems or — often — lie about them outright, in a sort of “wait-and-see-if-it-goes-away” approach.

So no, Aleena — “Leensy” — was not perfect. She’s a lovely, hilarious bundle of vulgarity, goodwill, and generosity, who’s simply out of practice in relationships, and whose overwhelming concern with maintaining the goodwill of others just presents a few roadblocks to happy ones in her future. She’s a tenacious little number, though, who underestimates her own faculties…I have every confidence she’ll end up with the happiness and fulfillment she so richly deserves.